September 9, 2013

"Make Today Ridiculously Amazing" is a quote I just posted on Facebook. As soon as I posted it, I thought, well Susan, how are you going to make today ridiculously amazing since you don't feel like doing anything other than resting in bed? Well, I'm not going to be beat! Even though I remain somewhat limited from my surgery last week, I am going to give it my best shot, starting with updating my blog :)

Since I posted last, my surgical biopsy went well last Wednesday. The doctor removed three nodes from my left side and two from my right, which included the sentinel nodes - all apparently benign! While I was in surgery, they performed a pathology test on them with plans to conduct a more thorough report of them during the next few days but our surgeon was very optimistic they are benign - thank you, God :) This procedure was performed as an outpatient procedure, but due to the amount of pain I was in, they admitted me to the hospital part of the center where I remained until I was discharged on Friday afternoon. The doctor thought he could have hit a nerve on the right side as that was the side I only had two nodes removed, but it was where the majority of my pain resided.

By the way, I cannot say enough about the outpouring of care and compassion given to me and Scott by the staff . . . all the staff. Sometimes I even forget I have cancer . . . for a moment or two :)

I initially was given a morphine pump, which I didn't think I used very much, but Scott quickly corrected me :) They took me off the pump on Thursday and began administering some oral pain medications. I took my daily walks down the hall and back, and all the time, Scott was right there . . . with me . . . and then with a staff person when we'd get caught :) He made a very good nurse but after trying to fix my hair on Thursday he was almost fired! Seriously . . .

My bandages were removed Friday afternoon. I was surprised to see how low the incisions were as most of my pain is in the axilla (arm pit) areas. As long as I kept my arms closely tucked to my body and didn't lift anything or move them, the pain was tolerable, but that is hard to do . . . at best!

After I was discharged, we finally had our long-awaited consult with the plastic surgeon. Once again, Scott was well in tuned as I was sitting there trying to ignore the stinging pain in my arms. We thought we had two options, implants or utilizing my own tissue, regarding the type of reconstructive surgery, but we didn't. Utilizing my own tissue from my abdomen area is not an option . . . too bad they can't flip you like a pancake during surgery and take it from somewhere else :) We spent a lot of time with the plastic surgeon, trying to gain an understanding of the process and ask our 40-11 questions. He too was very compassionate and patient with us, ensuring we had an understanding of the procedure as bet we could.

We left the center around 4:30 p.m. (CST) for the airport. We had dinner at the same place as before in Concourse G . . . think it was called Cubs . . . imagine that, huh? Then, I slept most of the way until we landed in Knoxville. We got home late but slept in Saturday morning, awakening to Austin's 12th birthday - 12 years old  . . . where has time gone? Austin was spending the weekend with his father so we were anxious to celebrate with him last evening with steaks from the grill, a big birthday chocolate chip cookie, complete with a "1" and "2" on top, and an Xbox 360 . . yep, took the boys the rest of the evening to hook all that up!

So, our next step on our pathway to recovery? My bilateral mastectomy and the beginning of my reconstructive surgery is scheduled for Monday, September 23 at 7:30 a.m. (CST). We will be returning to Chicago on Thursday, September 19 for my pre-op exam, as well as a physical, a genetics follow up, survivorship support consult, quality of life consult and more physical therapy treatment and preparation to reduce my risk of lymphedema following the surgery. Following my surgery, our team of doctors will then know if I should have or will need chemo and/or radiation.

This has been and continues to be a life-altering and emotional time in my life. I continue to face many fears. A million thoughts race through my mind every day. Trying to figure out how I will rehabilitate my body, mind and spirit is simply daunting. But one thing we quickly realized is how crucial it is to have a high level of confidence in our doctors along my pathway to recovery and at the Cancer Treatment Center of America, we do . . . no doubts :)

So, I'm going to continue to make today a ridiculously amazing day . . . and I hope you will too.

And remember, together, God and I?  . . . we got this! :)